Fear

What, you don't think that 6' 3" 300 pound men aren't afraid? I have lived my life afraid of my own shadow. I have lived in fear of failure. I have lived in fear of success. I have lived in fear of of damn near everything.

I mentioned before that there is a time and a place to contemplate. Contemplation can also bring about inaction due to fearing the outcome. So many times there has been an urge to take an action in my life, but I make myself stop and think about the possible outcomes, and the result is being frozen from action by fear of the possibilities.

To weigh possibilities is not entirely bad, but to weigh them and always focus on the negative is! If I had not taken a chance on a bike ride, where would I be today. I would probably still be in the same dead end job, contemplating making a change that I did not believe I was capable of. I would probably be somewhere in the neighborhood of 375 to 400 pounds. I would probably be knocking on deaths door. I would not have made any difference in the world.

Fear is natural, and not always negative. Sometimes fearing something can stop you from making a mistake. Living in fear constantly is negative. It stops you from changing what you are, and prevents you from becoming what you are capable of.

I have said previously, that I often don't believe that I am capable of much. While it is an accurate statement of how I view myself, it is not necessarily true. We all have limitless potential if we set fear aside and take on a challenge. Maybe it is a new job. Maybe it is a physical challenge. Maybe it is just accepting that it is okay to be afraid and step forward into something we want to try anyway. If you are able to take that first step, often you will survive; (maybe 99.9999% of the time). If nothing else, after you take that first step, you will find that you are amazed that you were afraid of nothing all that bad.

I am afraid of cancer. I am afraid of failing. I am afraid that I am not living up to my potential. I am afraid that I am a failing at being a father. I am afraid of losing people I love. I am afraid that I have not done enough to change the world around me. I am afraid that I have not used my abilities. I am afraid that I have not mattered. But the good thing, is that I am starting to realize before it is too late, that I can change some of these things. Tomorrow is not guaranteed to any of us. That is why the present is a gift. I will work on living in the present and accepting everyday as a gift. An opportunity to put my fear aside and make a difference.

Fear can also teach us that we need to change. We need to grow. We need to be aware that there is a time to face fear and alter the course we have chosen. Thank you to all who accept me and my fears. Thank you to those who allow me to change my course knowing that I don't have all the answers. Thank you to those that stand beside me regardless of the mess that I am inside my own head.

I close with this:

Take inventory of yourself, see if any remnants of fear are standing in your way. Then you may grow... because nothing, absolutely nothing, can stand in your way. - Napoleon Hill